There’s something electric about the start of a school year. The energy is high. The hallways are buzzing. Staff are refreshed, students are (mostly) excited, and as the leader, you feel that fresh-start fire. It’s what we often call the “honeymoon phase.” Everything feels new, hopeful, and full of possibility.
But then…reality walks in.
Maybe it’s late September. Maybe it’s not even past Labor Day. Suddenly that new-year sparkle starts to fade. The to-do list gets longer. The smiles get shorter. Systems get strained. You can feel the shift—and it’s real.
This is where leadership truly begins.
See, anyone can lead when the skies are clear. But the real work happens when things get tough. When the honeymoon ends, your greatest leadership tool isn’t a new initiative or a shiny idea—it’s relationships. That’s where the magic still lives.
Here’s how to lead through the post-honeymoon stretch—and keep your people (and yourself) grounded in what matters most:
1. Name It, Don’t Fake It
Let’s be honest: this season can feel heavy. Pretending it’s not doesn’t help anyone. When you name the hard stuff, you show your staff that you see them—and that builds trust.
Try this: start a staff meeting with, “Y’all… this time of year is tough. But I see you. I appreciate you. And we’re in this together.” That kind of realness goes a long way.
2. Be Present, Not Perfect
By now, people have seen the real you—and that’s a good thing. You don’t have to have it all together. What they need most is your presence, not your perfection.
Pick two people a day. Say hey. Ask about their weekend. Check in about something non-work related. That five-minute moment in the hallway? It means more than you think.
3. Bring the “Why” Back into Focus
When you’re deep in the grind, it’s easy to forget why we do this. Remind your team. Tell the story of that student who’s thriving. Shout out the teacher who made someone’s day. Celebrate the little things.
When people feel seen, they remember the mission.
4. Own It and Repair It
Let’s be real—by October, some relationships might feel a little tense. Misunderstandings happen. Feelings get hurt. Strong leaders don’t ignore that. They lean in with humility.
Say, “I didn’t handle that well,” or “Can we reset?” Owning our mistakes builds way more credibility than pretending we don’t make any.
5. Lead with Empathy and Grace
Everyone’s carrying something—some of it invisible. Maybe it’s burnout. Maybe it’s personal. Maybe it’s both. Your compassion creates safety.
Be the leader who checks in quietly. Loosen expectations when it’s needed. Say, “Take a moment. I’ve got you.” That’s not weakness—that’s real leadership.
6. Protect the Joy
Joy is usually the first thing to disappear when the pressure piles on. Don’t let it. Fun fuels connection—and connection sustains momentum.
Jeans day. Coffee cart. Silly staff challenges. Spotify playlists. Five minutes of laughter can shift the energy of an entire week.
7. Set the Tone (Even When You’re Tired)
You’re human. You’re tired too, but your team is watching how you lead through the hard. You don’t have to be the loudest or the happiest—you just have to be steady.
A smile. A kind note. A calm presence. That’s how you model hope—and right now, people need that more than ever.
Here’s the Truth:
The honeymoon phase might be over, but your leadership matters more now than ever. This is where real impact is made. In the middle. In the mess. In the choosing to show up anyway.
When you keep people at the center, when you lead with empathy and authenticity, you’re not just surviving the stretch—you’re leading a team that sticks together through it.
You don’t have to do it all. You just have to keep showing up, heart first.
You’ve got this. We’re in it with you.
Todd Nesloney is TEPSA’s Director of Culture and Strategic Leadership. He is an award-winning educator, author and international speaker.
Ross Braun is a former elementary principal who is passionate about supporting schools and leaders to ensure every child has a safe, loving, and engaging learning environment. Ross is now the VP of Positive Education at Spring, Texas-based, School Life.
